I was at a local grocer staring at this other stuff called "That's My Jam" Core. It made me think of Samantha Irby, because she's always talking about stuff that's her jam. (She's 900% awesome by the way. Do me a favor--visit her blog, buy her book Meaty, follow her on IG. She's awesome. I want to meet her and pet her kitty.) My tumblr favorites and crushes are constantly talking about jams. This, btw, is one of my jams. It's an actual song. I know, I'm such a lame. I thought about using the Jam pic for one of those memes or reaction pics. I dunno.Anyway, back to this edible fro-yo.
As a child of the 90's, I have culinary flashbacks about what fro-yo used to taste like. The ones that were good for you tasted funny. The ones that tasted better probably weren't good for you. My grandmother would randomly pick both to please her palate, not the super-tastebuds of her rotund 8 year-old grand-daughter. I had to eat whatever it was if I wanted some dessert! So, I ate. I ate, I cringed, I vowed to stay the hell away from fro-yo. I mean it. I've never been to Pinkberry and the rest of those places people gush about. Trust. Issues.
Anyway, back to this delectable fro-yo.
I'm in the aisle with all of my big body, trying NOT to have a starry look in my eyes. I get overwhelmed, okay? The brands, my favorites, and not really having an idea of what I want in mind. I usually just grab something and go. It's a well-known fact that Ben & Jerry's is everything, so I grab the first strawberry thing I see. Strawberry Shortcake fro-yo, with Greek yogurt. Oh goody goody. Everyone's on team Greek yogurt these days. It's one of those "in" things, although most US versions are NOT authentic with the sugar content. I had the chance to get some real stuff from Sam's Club years ago, and it's nowhere near as sweet as Yoplait or Dannon, but still tangy and good enough.
Blah blah. What about the fro-yo?!
It tasted so good, it hurt my feelings. 'Twas so sweet and perfect that I felt a song about to burst from my lips. I had to get it AND the spoon in my hand away from me. I was ready to get really sexy on the counter, eat it all, regret it later, and WALK to the store for more. YES--IT WAS THAT GOOD. Not healthy at all, but good. Plain ol' good. No after-taste, no flashback to fro-yo horrors of the 90's, just good stuff.
I wasn't really thinking of whether it was authentic or not. You'll have to hit up the FB page and ask ol' Ben and Jerry yourselves. All I can say is this--it tastes just like regular ice cream. The sweetness of the yogurt, the yum of the shortbread bits, and the oh-so-berrylicious-ness of the strawberry bits. We're talkin' milkshake-worthy type stuff. 'Twas delish, and I think you should get some. Right now. Go get it. Find something to watch, eat it, mooooooooan, and do it again.
(Then regret it later when the dairy works its intestinal magic.)
Like most B&J's stuff, it's indulgent. Unnaturally indulgent. It's the kind of ice cream you eat standing over the counter while you celebrate some moment of your life. You let it ride on your tongue as you press the spoon and ice cream a little closer. It just....is. Unnnfh.