Faith, Obstacles, and Facilitations

  "No" and "not this time" have been part of my vocabulary for a long time. What can I say? I've been a wallflower introvert for as long as I can remember. I tend to fall back behind the scenes, if you will. As a YWD leader, that's not really an option. I mean, I'm 'sposed to be doing pioneer-type stuff, right? That also means stepping up into roles that are front and center.

  Front and center. OY. Stepping up to the plate probably isn't a big deal to people who're natural born leaders. For those of us who might have the determination but not the presence, it's like presenting your project to your classmates...in your underwear. o_O All eyes on you, sweat beads all over, brain going a mile a minute--that was me Saturday the 27th.

  This isn't the first time I've facilitated a meeting. However, it's been a while. To buff up my leadership skills, obviously I have to be in a role where I'm willing to discuss study topics and lead Gongyo. Suddenly, the quiet and collected lady is a wide-eyed, shaky-voiced jumble of nerves. Not only had I forgotten the topic hours beforehand, but my stomach was churning and turning.

  Remember the "light switch" from my last post? Yeah, the concept of saying "okay! I will do it!" first, and acting later? I decided to follow that guideline last week, when I was asked to facilitate. Sure, why not? I needed the practice. As a YWD leader and member, I needed to exert myself for the cause of kosen-rufu. So, despite all the nerves in my body wanting to dash down the street, I accepted my mission.

  I was front and center in the room, and our topic was faith and overcoming obstacles. This is something that has been a part of every religion I've affiliated myself with--from my early days at Robinson Chapel, my youth at Church of The Living God #120 and #72, Tabernacle Missionary Baptist, and 3rd Baptist. It's obviously a different concept with Nichiren Buddhism, but two things have remained the same--walking in faith, and praying with determination.

  So many things came into play as I quickly brought myself together for discussion. I noticed that the topic tied in with a previous study session about the Eight Winds. Suddenly, things came together. I started furiously putting my notes together, seeing so much of myself in Sensei Ikeda's message and the passage itself. I wanted to share my notes. (click on each pic if you want get a closer look.)

Notes came from the help of Living Buddhism, Sept. publication, page 8. :)

  It was so wonderful being able to facilitate the meeting again, and telling my neighbor how much I admired her and the rest of the SGI fam. Since I began my practice, I've been listening to their stories. They're all such a positive, happy bunch of people...but they're also very realistic. Meaning, they're not walking around with painted on smiles, but they're not letting the weight of the world get to them. They're all such beautiful, inspirational people.

  I fumbled a bit, but we had a great conversation about faith and using our wisdom to see through the things ready to take us off the path. It helped me get a better understanding between relative and absolute happiness. Above all else, it was another moment where I saw practice in action. :)