As a child of the 90s, I can't even begin to tell you about all the crazy snacks we had back then. It sounds so silly to say things like that, but think about how long ago that was. The 90s were twenty-one years ago. I'm 26. In 1990, I was 5 years old. Not much of an accomplishment in comparison to other living creatures in this world, but there are things that happened then that I find myself having to explain to kids I'm around today. While there's nothing new about younger generations and snacking, it seemed like there was a lot more of it in the 90s. It's a wonder we all came out alive. (Of course, a few of us just got really fat. :-P )
Is it odd to tell someone "I'm hip to the jive of Toaster Strudels"? It probably is. I won't say that again. I can remember these things came in about four or five flavors when I was a young kid. There was apple, blueberry, strawberry, and some kind of mixed berry flavor. As time went by, they made some kind of cream cheese flavor, an egg and ham strudel, and even one with the trademark Cinnabon flavoring.
Toaster Strudels were thick, sweet, crunchy, and had that clear goo on the inside that would ooze out if you held it wrong. It would burn your tongue to heck if you didn't wait. The ones with egg in them would sometimes be frozen in the middle, even when you cooked them like the instructions said to. The best part was that little packet of frosting. I could never get that thing right! I would always open it wrong and the frosting would ooze out of the side. I would simply smear it on and walk away licking my fingers. On a good day, I'd make a squiggle design. Once my dad decided they weren't a good thing to have for a snack or for breakfast, they simply weren't around the freezer anymore. By that time, I was in high school and eating either candy or a bagel for breakfast anyway.
Span to the last shopping day. I'm strolling down the aisle of the frozen breakfast section with my usual booty of Morning Star goodies and deciding to ditch Hot Pockets this month when I see them sitting there in the middle of all the Eggo waffles. I haven't had any in ages, wondering if the still tasted the same. So I grab the box and go down the aisle thinking I'm about to re-live a part of my childhood while putting the toaster sweet to the test. How much trademark flavor are we talkin' here? I haven't had a sticky, nutty, caramel-y Cinnabon cinnamon bun in years. Last time I went, South Park was barely a year old and my father was still driving a green mini-van lovingly named "Old Bessie".
I get 'em home and pop in two. I know, shame on the ol' fatty. These things come six in a pack and gradually have decreased in size and weight. Unless my memories of a decade and some change ago have failed me, they were never this flimsy or small. In any case, I waited and waited until they popped out of my toaster. As usual, the first frosting packet comes undone all wrong. I smear that one. The second one comes out fine and I do a spiral design like an unoriginal artist. I can't wait for that first bite and wait a sad three seconds before biting into the hot pastry. The familiar smell of crust, the taste of the butter, and bread-like cooked dough all meet my taste buds and nose at once. I can hear the crunch, feel the heat biting my tongue, and then....then....the cinnamon.
The "cinnamon" was dismal. Light, airy, amber-colored goo inside a warm, rectangular pastry. I think my imagination was expecting way too much flavor just because it had the Cinnabon label on it. I can't say it was awful, but any generic brand of Toaster Strudel could have made this. Had I the time, the patience, and the baking skills of a master, I could have made this. There was a generic cinnamon taste that reminded me of Apple Cinnamon Cheerios if they were eaten in water and covered in sugar.
It's really nothing but a cheap little snack that kids would probably enjoy more than a 26 year-old child at heart. It might be funny and strange for me to say I was disappointed by this old snack, but I was. I felt the same way when I ate two Pop-Tarts the day Prince William and Kate Middleton got married. I sat there looking at those things wondering why I loved them with a glass of milk as a child. Suddenly, I was craving my real breakfast of Special K Red Berries and a splash of milk in my red bowl. It's very possible to grow the things we loved as children--and this includes foods we loved. While I don't hate these things, I can't say I'll be stopping in the middle of the aisle to taste test any extra flavors.
I get 'em home and pop in two. I know, shame on the ol' fatty. These things come six in a pack and gradually have decreased in size and weight. Unless my memories of a decade and some change ago have failed me, they were never this flimsy or small. In any case, I waited and waited until they popped out of my toaster. As usual, the first frosting packet comes undone all wrong. I smear that one. The second one comes out fine and I do a spiral design like an unoriginal artist. I can't wait for that first bite and wait a sad three seconds before biting into the hot pastry. The familiar smell of crust, the taste of the butter, and bread-like cooked dough all meet my taste buds and nose at once. I can hear the crunch, feel the heat biting my tongue, and then....then....the cinnamon.
The "cinnamon" was dismal. Light, airy, amber-colored goo inside a warm, rectangular pastry. I think my imagination was expecting way too much flavor just because it had the Cinnabon label on it. I can't say it was awful, but any generic brand of Toaster Strudel could have made this. Had I the time, the patience, and the baking skills of a master, I could have made this. There was a generic cinnamon taste that reminded me of Apple Cinnamon Cheerios if they were eaten in water and covered in sugar.
It's really nothing but a cheap little snack that kids would probably enjoy more than a 26 year-old child at heart. It might be funny and strange for me to say I was disappointed by this old snack, but I was. I felt the same way when I ate two Pop-Tarts the day Prince William and Kate Middleton got married. I sat there looking at those things wondering why I loved them with a glass of milk as a child. Suddenly, I was craving my real breakfast of Special K Red Berries and a splash of milk in my red bowl. It's very possible to grow the things we loved as children--and this includes foods we loved. While I don't hate these things, I can't say I'll be stopping in the middle of the aisle to taste test any extra flavors.